~*~ Chai Dreams ~*~

10am


*calls dermatologist office*

Receptionist: Good Morning

Me: Good morning, um...uh...duh (t's 10am people, I can barely function!)....

Receptionist: *laughs* yes?

Me: Sorry *nervous laugh* I have an appointment today and I just wanted to know which office I have to go to.

Receptionist: Let me check his schedule...*type type type*

Receptionist: He'll be at the main office today, but let me check just in case *asks for my info*

Me: *gives info*

Receptionist: Um...Your appointment was canceled.

Me: What??

Receptionist: Yeah, looks like they never left you a message either. Would you like to reschedule?

Me: Um...YEAH

Receptionist: How about October 1st?

Me:um...I need to get sutures removed....

Receptionist: Well...then October won't do...

Me: *mumbles* no shit...

Receptionist: Well I left I message with him asking if he can fit you in soon, we'll call you back later today.

Me: ok, thanks.



4:30pm

*calls dermatologist office*


Receptionist: Blah blah blah may I help you?

Me: Hi, I called earlier about rescheduling my appointment but no one called me back.

Receptionist: *asks for info*

Me: *gives info*

Receptionist: Hmmm....*giggles* well...you could have come in today...

Me: Really...

Receptionist: Well it's too late now *giggles some more* How about the 10th?

Me: *stabs self in the eye* That's fine



ARRRRGGHHHSTUPIDPEOPLEARRRRRRGHHHHHH!!!$&@$^@@*&%symbols@&^

</rant>

I hate hearing my mom go through so much pain. T.T

She was talking to me on the phone this morning and she sounded like she was about to cry and then I felt like crying but held back because I didn't want her to feel worse.

I still can't believe the year we've had so far...one minute I'm shopping with my mom and then the next minute I'm visiting her at the nursing home, watching her learn how to walk again. Watching her being hooked up to the dialysis machine. Struggling to get around in her wheelchair. It's kinda like we've reversed roles or something. I feel like she's my kid now and I have to do everything I can to take care of her, but there's a crossroad here. I want to take care of her, but I need to start my life, yet when I even think about it I feel so guilty and selfish. Like I'm letting her down or something.

Even though she's told me that I need to focus on myself more, I can't help it. I want her to see me go back to school, graduate, become someone but I feel like I should be helping her more. Can I do both? Am I able to handle that much? I haven't been in school for so long and I'm not sure i can even handle that right now.


I don't know how I'm going to do this.

I just ate half a pint of ice cream and it was gooooooooood.

Ok, I'm home and alone. (AHHHHHHHH!!!)



So I'm sitting at my desk and my doorbell rings. I go and check who it is and no one is on the other side of the door.  Mind you, my bell hasn't worked in about a month...

It rang again a few minutes later and much louder, so I checked again and no one was on the other side.

Now I'm sitting at my desk again and I hear noises in the kitchen...



Where's "Ghost Hunters" when you need them?... :{






P.S. It just rang again and for a long time and yet no one is there...What are the odds that my bells starts working again after a month and starts ringing on it's own?


P.P.S. It's ringing and I'm afraid to open my door and check the bell...lol

3 sutures on my upper back...

4 sutures on my lower back...

Add killer cramps and an hour worth of driving over safety bumps and pot holes...well...let's just say I'm not in the best of moods.


Fuck.

Why did my friend show me a picture of a GIANT FRIGGIN JUMPING SPIDER?

I won't be able to sleep now...

and I have to go out today.....


Crap.


make the giant spidy go away.... -.-

New layout, woo!

Too bad I'm too tired to make an actual post...


*Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz*

I've been pretty busy the past few days, and haven't been able to stay online as long as usual,  for reasons I will soon reveal as soon as I start the process.of the...thing that I am doing...let's just say that I don't want to "jinx" anything. Wish me luck!

So, last week I had an appointment with the dentist. I have to admit, I don't usually go. One, because my family could never afford it and two, I was usually scared of out my mind. I do remember my dad trying to take me to one for a check-up, but I fought tooth (no pun intended) and nail to get out of that (just like I fought to get out of karate class. I don't think they should tell prospective students that messing up on a lesson means they will have to fight the master with sticks and face the possibility of getting a "beat down" as punishment). So, knowing that I don't usually go, I was shocked to find out that I only have three cavities. I don't think that's so bad considering how long it took me the courage to go actually go. Anyway, that's not the worst of it. Unfortunately I have to get surgery done to remove my two upper wisdom teeth, ain't that a...female dog.

I've never gotten any kind of surgery done and to be honest, I'm pretty nervous. Like, how bad is this going to hurt?, and how long will it take to heal? and how bad is this going to hurt??

I want my Mommy....


In other (bad) news, I gained weight. First I lost it and then I gained it back. This sucks!! Thing is, I k now I haven't been eating right. Usually I don't have time to prepare a decent meal and grab the first thing I see.

Yes, I'm a bad girl. Shame on me :(

But damn that strawberry shortcake ice cream was good :-D

Ciao!

What type of Fae are you?


I suppose there is some truth to this...maybe...kinda...dammit

Grabbed from queenmidalah

I feel nauseous. I don't know why but I feel as if I might throw up very soon. Yeah, I know, perfect time to update, lol.

Been busy the past few days, applying for jobs, avoiding the gym, cleaning (because I had nothing better to do on a saturday night), and a funeral (not all in that order). I know the smell now and it's horrible. I couldn't stay in the funeral home for long because I felt like the smell was clinging to me. I stood as long as I could for the sake of my grandmother (It was her sister-in-law that passed. My grandfather's sister, who also passed almost a year ago yet it still feels surreal), but after I made sure she was ok, my mom and I high-tailed it out of there and stood outside until it was over. She knows the smell too.

A few months ago a lady had passed in our apartment building...and was left there for about 2 weeks, with her daughter still living in the apartment. If the smell was making everyone who passed by the floor sick, I wonder what she felt and how she could stand it and WHY? WHY would you do THAT? ugh, I think I'm going to throw up.

Imogen Heap from Frou Frou has a new album and I want it. I'm listening to it right now and I would advise anyone reading this to do the same. Ya might like it :)

Randomness:

Imogen: Latin
Meaning: Image

I like this name...a lot. If I ever have a girl I think I'll name her Imogen, but how would you make a nickname out of that? Imo? Mogen? Gen? Immy?? lol

Interesting Link for Today:

Life Expectancy Watch

Because I need a constant reminder....

Source: TechieDiva

It's not bad...It's an acquired taste...but it sure does pack a punch. Wonder Drink

So, I had a busy day yesterday. Had to fix some things at my bank...actually they had to fix some things being that their computers got all wonky and wouldn't cooperate. Everything is all good now. Then I put in some applications. First to H&M (oh god, how will I stand working retail again??) and Old Navy. Mind you, I wasn't thinking about just looking for a job...I did some shopping as well :-D.


So, after the job hunting (to support my shopping habit), I walked the 10 blocks from 34th street to 24th. Oh My God...Now I can truly say "I'm not as young as I used to be" I went to high school on 24th street and everyday (or at least the days I actually attended) I would walk to 34th street or even 42nd!  This means I really need to get my butt back to the gym.

Anyways, I went into the whole foods market for the first time and all I have to say is, Why isn't there one where I live?! I found all the things I've been looking for and more!  Organic pasta sauce, healthy breakfast bars, Vitamin water galore! (oh how I love thee!) Yes, I will have to travel quite a bit for the food I want, but damn if it isn't worth it :)

Jamba Juice was across the street...I wonder it there are any apts available for under $1500 around there...yeah, I didn't think so either. lol

A little nostalgia...

Front doors the high school I went to. High School of Fashion Industries...Only in New York, lol

Also, I'd like to say Hi to everyone that added me!

Ciao!

So fishing is out. Turns out the weather isn't in our favor and we'll have to wait till it gets warmer, which is fine. Not that I didn't want to go fishing with my dad, but I have some really important errands to run and would rather get it out of the way as soon as I can.

Yet again insomnia has taken over, but I was productive this time. I got some laundry out of the way annnnd...yeah, that's it, lol. I'm supposed to be out of the house by noon, think I'll make it? yeah, me neither, lol.

Now, how cool are these?



Now, I hate dieting. Personally I think it's a waste of time and never works, but I'm all for these Mesu Portion bowls  from Studio Panepinto. I really hate measuring out what I have to eat. It's annoying and after all that I don't feel like eating anymore, but I think these bowls would be the perfect solution. Now only if they didn't cost $50....

Which reminds me, I have to go to the gym this week, I missed all of last week and am starting to feel a lil guilty, lol.

Source: Popgadget

...and I'm awake. And I just spilled iced tea on my desk...with my cell phone on it. Yes, I need sleep, but for some reason I can't do it. If I try I just end up staring at the ceiling ( that can mess with your head after a while), so I end up watching t.v till the sun comes up or I'm here...online...doing nothing. The most I get is about 2 hours of sleep before I start my day.

Monday morning I'm going fishing with my dad. It's been about two years since the last time I went so it should be fun. Fishing also requires me to get up at the butt crack of dawn, so hopefully I'll drain enough energy throughout the day and can "reset" my sleeping pattern. Seriously, how am I'm going to hold down a job if i can't even sleep through the night? which reminds me...I have a few applications to put in (wish me luck).

People are stirring in the house...time for me to hide.

Don't you hate when people write that? Yes your post may have been first, but sometimes it's useful to add a little more to the fucking comment. Drives me mad! That and people responding with "I just threw up a little in my mouth" Swallow it back down and stfu.

Soo...Hello everyone...or just the one...or whoever actually passes by this little page where I will spill my guts about my life and opinions. Hopefully I'll keep up with this blog, unlike the previous blogs (yes, plural) I had or maybe this will be the only post ever and it will go down the toilet like all blogs that..uh..don't update.

Either way, glad to be here. Now, I'm going to go off and find me some new friends.

C-ya laterz